This marks the third time my finals has driven to blog.
I think I'm really just in need of something else to do.
Maybe just searching for an avenue to let all the trapped frustrations within out.
The past few days seems to have passed by in a daze of work, computer, taking meals, getting comments and travelling back and forth to college. Sleep figured little in between, if any at all.
My body seems to have reached a certain point of limitation. I fell asleep unconsciously in front of my computer just now, sitting in my chair. I don't know when it happened, how it happened, and how long it happened.
Friends marvel at this "ability" to fall asleep. I don't see it as an ability. How hard can it be for the body to decide it's taken enough abuse and just "hibernate"?
Within me rage monsters fighting simultaneous battles. One strives to complete the formal college assignment, another argues about the hopelessness and futility of that. One brings up regret and remorse for idling time away, another charges just to move on and not think too much. Yet another thinks about a certain someone, its counterpart proceeding to emphasize another someone. Still another misses home, and another reminds that I'm leaving the other place I call home soon.
Few people are aware that I'm moving from the sisters' house in Subang soon. Next Wednesday is the end of January, and also my tenancy. When I decided to move out, I only wanted to get away from the congestion and overcrowding, as it had seemed. Now, as it approaches, I fail to comprehend a reason why I needed to leave. But there isn't really, a reason not to either. What complicates matters is that I have grown used to yet another place I called home for almost a year.
I'm beginning to treasure the peals of laughter breaking through the house. The gathering of people in the living room, in the kitchen. The long talks with certain one or two late into the night. The quiet of the night where music becomes my companion. My table lighted to segregate my "corner". The wind gently caressing the trees outside. The calmness of the roads at 3 a.m. in contrary to the day activities. The meeting of campus brothers and sisters every week. Going out with them.
Somehow as I wrote, I lost my line of thought. My mind wandered as it wished, soothed by music from The Lake House.
It's a wonder one can feel and think about so many things all at once. I half float around, feeling like I would faint but never managing to do so. I hugged myself tight to ease the urge to scream and break something.
Now back to the project that must be finished...
I think I'm really just in need of something else to do.
Maybe just searching for an avenue to let all the trapped frustrations within out.
The past few days seems to have passed by in a daze of work, computer, taking meals, getting comments and travelling back and forth to college. Sleep figured little in between, if any at all.
My body seems to have reached a certain point of limitation. I fell asleep unconsciously in front of my computer just now, sitting in my chair. I don't know when it happened, how it happened, and how long it happened.
Friends marvel at this "ability" to fall asleep. I don't see it as an ability. How hard can it be for the body to decide it's taken enough abuse and just "hibernate"?
Within me rage monsters fighting simultaneous battles. One strives to complete the formal college assignment, another argues about the hopelessness and futility of that. One brings up regret and remorse for idling time away, another charges just to move on and not think too much. Yet another thinks about a certain someone, its counterpart proceeding to emphasize another someone. Still another misses home, and another reminds that I'm leaving the other place I call home soon.
Few people are aware that I'm moving from the sisters' house in Subang soon. Next Wednesday is the end of January, and also my tenancy. When I decided to move out, I only wanted to get away from the congestion and overcrowding, as it had seemed. Now, as it approaches, I fail to comprehend a reason why I needed to leave. But there isn't really, a reason not to either. What complicates matters is that I have grown used to yet another place I called home for almost a year.
I'm beginning to treasure the peals of laughter breaking through the house. The gathering of people in the living room, in the kitchen. The long talks with certain one or two late into the night. The quiet of the night where music becomes my companion. My table lighted to segregate my "corner". The wind gently caressing the trees outside. The calmness of the roads at 3 a.m. in contrary to the day activities. The meeting of campus brothers and sisters every week. Going out with them.
Somehow as I wrote, I lost my line of thought. My mind wandered as it wished, soothed by music from The Lake House.
It's a wonder one can feel and think about so many things all at once. I half float around, feeling like I would faint but never managing to do so. I hugged myself tight to ease the urge to scream and break something.
Now back to the project that must be finished...
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