Tuesday, February 22, 2005

Differing Emotions

You feel all tingly and warm inside. Like... a really quite pleasant thing, and then an image crosses the path of your mind and a smile winds up your face. You think how nice it is to be with that person, and how you hope to see that person again. And then you realize you were thinking about one of your close friends.

What happens next? You get jolted out of your "trance", and then wonder how on the earth could you have been thinking such thoughts. Isn't that person a close friend? Then why did you think about that person in such a way? But.... you don't get the same kind of heartbeat-increasing, knees-shaking or nervous feeling that you always get (or at least hear about) when you are supposedly thinking about someone you like, someone beyond friends.

Instead, all you have is a very comfortable feeling, just nice....fuzzy....warm...cozy feeling. No, it can't be, you tell yourself. He/She's just a friend. Besides, I can't possibly like him/her. He/She's just....just...so not my type. Unfortunately, you fail to be even remotely convincing. To yourself.

I do not know if this scenario is familiar, or if anyone has eperienced it before. But my point is, sometimes, on what do we base the feeling that tells us we like someone? Maybe we think it should be like a very strong emotion, blasting you off your feet. Perhaps, for some. But can it also be a very slow...very smooth and pleasant feeling? A feeling that develops over time, and finally catches you unawares?

Or....perhaps, you are merely thinking too much and has allowed your ever-resourceful wandering mind to expand all the possibilities, picking up tiny, little signs or actions like hints? Perhaps what you felt was merely a warm affection for that friend of yours.

Lessons in our life as we grow, also includes being able to differ emotions. Perhaps, as we grow older, wiser, the answers to the above questions can be answered. Have you begun to ask yet?