I said I would do this

It is now December.

I am still here.

Running away

Perhaps my running away from this blog is another sign of how far I'm running from reality.

Running away from questions.
Running away from problems.
Running away from unpleasant things.
Running away from disturbing thoughts.
Running away from thinking about my future.
Running away from thinking of my running away.

Yet perhaps this is my reality.




*this is what appears after months of not writing and thinking of something "profound" at 2:15 a.m.

KL Performing Arts Centre, Sentul

I've long wanted to visit this place - KL Performing Arts Centre (KLPac) in Sentul ever since it kept appearing in various architecture magazines. But since Sentul is way out of my usual radar, I've never taken the trouble to go there on purpose. So when Priscilla said she was going to a play there, I decided to buy a ticket and take myself on a trip :)

Unfortunately, I'm no longer a student so I can only buy the ticket at normal price =.=''

The play was inspired by Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream. The story is the same, except with change of characters and performed in traditional Mak Yong style. The actors even all spoke in the Kelantanese dialect (which I'm sure left many people in clouds during the whole play). It was rather hilarious too - cos they made references to the local scene - politics and H1N1 included.

The cast of Mak Yong "Titis Sakti" at the end of the show

And then, I proceeded to my main purpose of coming XD It was wonderful walking around the grounds and seeing the scenes only seen on magazines. There was a big park surrounding KLPac - the Sentul Park. I saw some children playing kites there too. Some were feeding the ducks (at least I think they're ducks) in the pond.

More pictures and fun are in my Facebook account :D

BreakOut performance

More performances from BreakOut, the Korean Extreme Dance Comedy group. There is a short and funny segment performed by them (prisoners and the cop). Then, they show off their dancing skills.





Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did!

Beatbox by BreakOut member

As mentioned earlier, one of the highlights of the Korean Embassy event was the Extreme Dance Comedy "BreakOut" B-boy performance. This is a beatbox performance by one of the members at the beginning. There were no audio on at that time, so whatever you hear was produced by this talented chap.

More videos when I'm done editing...

I just want to study

Maybe I'm not doing all the right things. Maybe I should just get on with my life. Maybe I should just go and work. Maybe I should stop getting so frustrated at my inability to do anything.

I want to go overseas to further my studies. And after much consideration and courage, I have decided that I want to study a foreign language. And unfortunately, I do not have any STPM papers to get into a local university, but a 3-year Diploma in Architecture that is probably not going to buy me any leverage.

I do not have money to go overseas and study. Neither do I have the credits or results to get myself a scholarship. What good are my results now anyway? I have 7A's from SPM 6 (oh my goodness, SIX!) years ago, and the horrid, deluded youth nowadays have 10 and above. And I have a 2.9 CGPA for my Diploma, which falls way short of the 3.50 CGPA requirement of scholarships I have come across. And besides, the Diploma is not for the course I want to study now anyway.

I am a good student. Oh, I'm not so self-important to think that I'm brilliant or the best. But I am a good student. I take notes and do not fall asleep in those classes people often deem too boring to stay awake for. I research and read up on subjects. I ask questions. I complete projects when the other members of the team do not even understand what we are doing. I study for exams. Heck, I love studying! I involve myself in extra-curricular activities and love to take part in event organising. I am reasonably outspoken and communicate well. And I'm supposedly the "genius" because I was 2 years younger than everyone in class (don't worry, I never believed in this for a second).

But all these do not seem to account for anything. They certainly do not show in my results. Or accomplishments. Wait, what accomplishments? Nope, no papers to show for anything. And the 2 years bought earlier have long been used up. Because I have graduated with the Diploma 2 years ago. And I'm at home. Not working in what I studied in and not furthering my studies.

I'm absolutely fine with staying at home. Because you know, I have to clean the house. And wash the clothes. And then give tuition so that I don't waste my time and earn some money. And then pay for the Internet and occassionally give pocket money to my brother.

Many people around me ask me what I am doing. Those who know always offer advice. Maybe you can try that, or take a look at that. Oh, I heard there's a scholarship for that programme in that country. Ok, I know all of them mean well. I thank them that they are so concerned. But when I do check out what they say (I do listen and take a look every time), I always hit a blank wall. It was so hard to check it in the first place because, all these well-meaning people never remember the exact, concrete details (like the website). There is nothing like anything that they mentioned. So where did they get all that from? Oh, I'll ask the person whom I heard from for you, they reply when I ask them again. When? I wonder. Information never comes fast enough. One week, two weeks. And then I never hear about it again.

I'm so sorry if I sound really ungrateful. But being grateful doesn't mean I don't get disheartened. It's just been so many times that I get my hopes raised, and then down it crashes.

I cannot plan for things in advance. Because, I keep telling people, I don't know where I will be or what I will be doing. A trip in December? Uh... you might wanna count me out since I might be in some foreign country, studying. Something happening in August? Er... my term has probably started by then.

Might. Probably. Maybe.

Come August or December, you might still find me sitting here at home ranting away on my blog.

I need something to happen.

I need...

I just want to study.

Korea, Closer Than You Imagine

Heard about this event from Pris, who heard from her friend :) We thought it would be fun to go, and since it's free, why not? A bit of an intro:

The event is organised by the Embassy of the Republic of Korea (ROK). The purpose is to promote bilateral relations between our two countries (Sounds rather... serious and political, eh?) Anyway, the good point is - the people they invited were undergraduates and graduates. Highlights included a dance comedy performance "Breakout" by one of the top B-boy Korean groups (who are also having public performances here), a taekwondo performance and more dances.

So, at 2.30 p.m yesterday, at the Grand Ballroom at Renaissance Hotel, KL, I went in with Pris and her friends - Yin Ling, Ka Ling and Rachel. First time meeting Rachel, who's one of Priscilla's close friends. At first I wasn't sure what to expect - and was wondering if we would hit it off. She's rather hyper, methinks.. Hahahaha XD Anyway, it was quite natural for us.

After some long, required speeches, the emcee announced the most exciting performance of the day - the BreakOut dance comedy. Very entertaining, and very funny. I recorded snippets here and there, so I'll have to edit the video and post it up when I'm done. After the dance, we (the crowd) were left to wander around the many displays the Embassy had put up.

I like the way the glasses and plates were displayed for the crowd to use.

Display of Korean food (but not real wan...)

Ka Ling remarked to me, "Hey, the host is the person from TV wan right? The one who host the Deal or No Deal, Chinese wan?" I was like, "Is it?" and craned my neck to get a look. Oooh ~ it was Owen Yap (葉劍鋒)... Pleasant surprise :D He was actually speaking in English, which I haven't heard before.

And of course, we decided not to be shy and go ask for a photograph. To find that there was already a crowd of people.. er, actually mostly girls (there were 2 guys) all clamouring to take a picture with the tall and good looking TV personality. Hahaha... So we waited for our turn. And here is mine:

I would have preferred the photo to be taken a little lower... but not thick-skinned enough to go ask for a reshoot la...

He actually already put one leg forward to appear shorter ==' And he did that for quite a lot of people who weren't blessed to reach his shoulder :P The people around were kinda laughing when I stood beside him. He crossed his arms, smiled and said "Hey, I can be very funny too..." Very nice of him. And he smiled and said "thanks" to everyone who took a picture with him.

Later when it was time for the lucky draw, he really got into his element. Made a lot of jokes with the audience, and even was rather sharp-tongued with the lucky winners ('cos he made them all say "thank you" in Korean). Supposed it's because we're all younger than him... Haha :P Pris said "So bad! He like lecturer only..."

The ballroom

With Pris (this and the photo below taken from her camera)

Pris and me with Korean F4 (life-sized model laa..)

I'm struck with the desire to buy a plane ticket and fly out to Korea...

Doing this Tag. Just because...

Haih... I don't usually do tags (though I like reading them except those reaaallly long ones where you have to answer 100 questions or something). And I did something like this in Facebook not too long ago, except it was 25 random things. Anyway, since I was tagged by Priscilla, who is one of my closest friends, and this tag is not so hard to do... (besides I'm still procrastinating)...

16 random things

Here's the direction:

Once you've been tagged, you have to write a post with sixteen random things, habits or goals about you. At last, choose five people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them.

1. I'm currently listening to DNR's Ice Cream. Nice song. (haha, I have no idea where to start so...)

2. I mostly only listen to ballads though on the occassion, I listen to something upbeat.

3. I just remembered that Priscilla wanted to know more about me, so maybe I have to think harder since she already knows no. 2. Hahaha...

4. I sometimes feel that writing in Mandarin is a more beautiful expression. Which is why I would like to learn more Mandarin to express myself better.

5. I like to learn many many things. For example, the piano, guitar, violin, dance, literature, history, art, French, Spanish, Korean, Japanese... (you get the idea)

6. I like to read things to get information. As such, I'm normally the person to read the information, analyse and dissect it and then summarize it to my friends (in a project) or my mother (when she asks me to do something).

7. I wish I was better in physical things. Because I really like sports like badminton, swimming, basketball, and gymnastics but I don't have the physical ability to be good in them.

8. I admire the fact that my brother and sister has cliques in the school. And that their clique actually do invite them for many things and are really close.

9. The reason I admire them is because I've never really felt like I belonged in or among my friends in school. It was better in college, I guess.

10. I'm wondering if it is because of the age difference or just because I haven't met like-minded people.

11. I always feel that I put myself more into any relationship/ friendship than the people involved. And it is very tiring.

12. As such, I'm teaching myself not to care for so many people not worth caring for. Or maybe just to accept that they will be acquaintances.

13. Besides, I don't need so many close friends, right? In the past few months, I have only been in contact with a few of my friends and have become somewhat like a social recluse. But I think that's fine.

14. I would like to be out of the country in the last quarter of this year, God willing. I really, really wish to continue my studies.

15. I'm often an upside-down person. I am awake in the night thru the wee hours, and sleep when the sun rises. I was normal last week but then I didn't quite know how to function =='

16. Which is probably why I'm awake now and typing this post. And forcing myself to finally continue my overdue workbook when I finish this.

* Not tagging anyone but if you wanna let people read 'bout you, then go ahead and reply :)